someone suggested that  look within myself,that it is always difficult to change  people and their behaviors ,so the easiest thing to do is to change youself . , by  seeking  help from our creator, both for myself and the other person. also not to give "this thing" too much power,this thing is also called "pain".. so  I feel the less  power given to this  friends  behaviour the better...now the real issue , I need to deveope a strategy to do this....Collen your answer is great , but see this friend has not realized what he is doing to us especially me, also he is not aware of his behaviour and how it affects others, so he still comes around and acts oblivious . this makes it difficult to have nothing to do with these caracters. then theres also the  kindness of my partner.He is not as sensitive as  myself  and the others that  are aware of this issue.

after this many yrs of friendship, this so called beriended  friend brother whatever,has suddenly become so so so infactuted witheverything his  partner is doing, we dont mind it if he is doing it when it is only the four of us , but he really  urks us when others are with us...he carries on on on...about the wonderful and that all the thing his partner does are better then everyone elses.....we have even gone as far as giving him the benefit of the daught..DOES HE WANT US TO LAY A RED CARPET OR CROWN HIS PARTNER KING OR  WHAT SHOULD WE DO..TO MAKE HIM STOP  HIS    NEW BEHAVIOR...OR SHOULD WE RECOMEND PSHYCH THERAPY , WITHOUT HURTING ANY FEELINGS..I ALSO DON'T WANT THEM TO ASSUME  ANYTHING...E.G THAT WE ARE JELOUS OF HIS WONDERFUL PARTNER......PLEASE ENLIGHTEN  ME  WITH AN EXPERT ANSWER THANKS