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    Why am I still doing this?

    I'm going to keep that short and sweet. I fell in love with my best friend and then ended up somehow telling her and everything sort of went down hill from then on. We'd barely spoke because things were so weird so eventually I just turned round to her one day and told her I didn't love her anymore and suddenly everything went back to normal, she'd smiled like she used to, she'd laugh like she used to, she'd joke like she'd used to and me? Well I'm not happy because all I've ever wanted I can't have but I don't mind because I look at her and realise because of what I did the one I always wanted will live to be all that somebody else wants. But lately, I don't know, I can't seemed to stop thinking about her, I did think about her before hand but I some how found something to occupy myself and the hurt wasn't so prominant but now I just can't get her out of mind. I'm so scared because I don't want to end up obsessive and lose her forever, I couldn't stand that. But I keep fueling the fire by telling myself that everytime I turn round and see her looking at me is because she feels exactly how I feel, and everytime we talk she face lights up and when I walk into a room we just seem to find eachother. It's complete nonsense I know but it's all I seem to be able to function on. When I told her i loved her I never got an answer from her she just went off and started being weird toward me which wasn't really helped by myself who was being just as weird with her because I figured it was best if we just keep our distance for some time even though that time just cut right through me. She eventually told her friends and in turn one of them confessed to me that she never mentioned how she felt only how I felt but another one of her friends just told me to give up an stop acting how I was toward because she would never feel anything for me, so that's when I told her i didn't love her even though I was and still am hopelessly in love with her. I need help, I need to know if it's worth still holding on or am I better giving up. I know it isn't as short and sweet as I had orginally planned but hey throw me a bone here, I and another million odd people are desperate for the one we can't have.

    0  Views: 812 Answers: 2 Posted: 13 years ago

    2 Answers

    Nothing worse than unrequited love, eh?

    Tell her how you feel - make sure she understands that you want a relationship that is more than just friends and you need to know how she feels about it - make sure it's a no holds bared conversation. She needs to understand your position, and you need to understand hers.

    If she doesn't want that kind of relationship with you, then you can either live in the hope she changes her mind (not good IMHO), walk away, or move on with her as just a friend.

    Personally - if she doesn't like your position, walk.

    There's no reason to make yourself miserable when there so much else to do in ones life.
    Scarfen

    Thankyou for your help. It's just I'm finding it so hard to see what it is that is happening with her. I told her I loved and she said nothing, even an rejections would have be better than nothing. I have zero closure and I just want a definate anwser, plus there was a two month peroid for her to tell me what she felt and she didn't say anything then her friend started to have a go at me and told me to stop what I was doing because I was hurting her ( I'm not sure how I was though as she never said anything) and that I should stop because apparently she doesn't feel a thing toward me. And then another one of her friends kept asking me how she actually felt as she hadn't told anything but the fact that I loved her and I didn't know how she felt. It's all so confuseing.
    Donna62

    Forgive me ,I don't want to sound rude but,.... When you told her that you loved her and she didn't reply, that was your closure.I'm not sure of your age but, let me reassure you ,your heart will mend, and when you least expect it,you will find that someone.Be thankful, she has saved you for that "Someone Special".

    I didn’t “love” my husband for a long, long time. Our love was a slow bloom. Sometimes it works that way.



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