Bob/PKB
I have a "friend" who tends to be rather negative. An abusive first marriage, a totally dishonest second marriage, left with tens of thousands of dollars of debt, caregiver for an unappreciative father, home filled with stray family members for years, a retirement system that doesn't provide what she paid for, etc. etc. etc. She loves to reminisce about how she pulled herself up and took care of everything all by herself and misses no opportunity to compare the relative ease I've experienced financially. She's been critical of my eldest son for years, my oldest and dearest friend, and last night she made some totally uncalled for remarks about my father, whom she never met, attributing them to "oldtimers" in my little home town.
I have ALWAYS listened politely and complimented her accomplishments, home, and efforts, been humble and am sincere in my admiration of what she has done with no support from anyone. BUT, last night, repeating gossip about my dad (d.2001, before I ever met her) is just more than I care to overlook. Do I say something to her about anything or just stop calling/answering. When I think of how often I sit through her list of injustices and self-accolades, giving her kudos, only to endure belittlement, I wonder why I bother to stay in touch at all.
7 Answers
pythonlover
Best answer!
She doesn't deserve your friendship. Anyone that makes us feel bad whilst in their company is not a friend. I detect a hint of jealousy on her part. If you can't find anything positive within the friendship call it quits and cut all ties with her.
| 10 years ago. Rating: 10 | |
jhharlan
Tommyh
Phyl,you are one of the nicest people I have ever coresponded with.Are you sure she's your friend?She sounds very competitive.I think I would put her in the cooler for a while.I just think we don't need that sort of crap when we're on this side of 60.We need to make the most of the life we have left,not be listening to someone belittling us.Don't let her get you down,remember you have friends here.
| 10 years ago. Rating: 13 | |
p.s. it is so nice to catch your answers every evening, like no one else is on the site. :-)
Clonge
You have plenty of friends here. You don't need her! If it makes you feel better, give her a blast.
| 10 years ago. Rating: 12 | |
hector5559
sunnyB
She doesn't really sound like the sort of friend you need. As others have said, you have plenty of friends here, don't bother with her anymore.
| 10 years ago. Rating: 8 | |
wonderer
I'd be hiding every time she comes knockin'...you just don't need friends like that...or the obvious stress she causes...stress is not a good thing, and it seems that's all she has to offer...take a nice long vacation from her...you won't miss out on anything...Good luck...and keep :) ing!.......
| 10 years ago. Rating: 6 | |
