4 Answers

I think what you feel is normal for a girl that was raised with proper morals. On the web, you must be very careful what is out there, its at a point now where most parents gave up on trying to control what comes into their homes via internet.  The owners of these sites are very crafty at luring you in under perfectly innocent searches. My complements to you that you do feel guilty it shows you have good sense.  Today, parents must teach their children right up front what is out there and hope that their children understand.  Now that you've seen it, you know what's there and you can avoid it.

Those are reasonable feelings from someone on the right path.  If you can talk to an adult you know and trust not to be judgmental, do so. I would tell my daughter that those videos are not really indicitive of  most healthy relationships. 

Forgive yourself asap, and  hold yourself to higher standards in your relationships. It sounds like you do. 

Unfortunately for you , you were very young to be exposed  to "X Rated" content. That's the sad part. What is done is done. Let the shame and guilt go.  What's the point beating yourself up over something that happened years ago. Put this experience down to....... you were in the wrong place at the wrong time. Forget about it, and live your life happily.

I wouldn't worry too much about it, because you were so young, and got manuvered into it. I'd blame the parent or guardian who left some  10---11 yr. olds  at home alone after school.......and for how long ? - - - -like 3 hours or so ?   If you don't get a good feeling about something,Blanche, then don't do it.  We're here for ya.