14 Answers
I was walking around the school grounds with a little kid when we noticed a fish tank in one of the windows. He asked what the thermometer was for and said to check the temperature and he asked "how do the little fishes get it into their mouths?".....
11 years ago. Rating: 18 | |
True story about me my two brothers and my father.. we all were working together on day and we stopped for lunch at Hifi pizza in dorchester mass, my brother had to use the john, a few moments after he went in to do his bussiness i had to go as well. He was in a stall taking a #2 while i used the wall urinal on my way out I spotted a mop and bucket and pretended I was the janitor and started mopping all around his feet, wow was he pissed, I backed off for a minute or two and began harrasing him again this time his cries were even louder so i backed off one more time .The third time i started to hit his ankles and the likes all harder he was crying harder than a new born baby, i walked back to the table were we sitting with a s#$t eating grin on my face my dad and other brother knew i was up to something moment later my brother walked out pale white and shaking "dad you wouldn't believe what the janitor did to me" at this moment we all burst out laughing...!!
11 years ago. Rating: 18 | |
I remember when first year teaching, taking a leftover carrot stick from lunch, and with cupped hand, hiding it. As I entered classroom, walked around rear of classroom, as usual, but this time as I passed the aquarium tank (which contained goldfish), dipping in the hand, and gulped the "fish". With no fanfare, or comment, and a dead straight face, I began the roll call and lesson. Minutes later, the wave of wispers, "did you see what he did, he's crazy!". After it came forward to the first row of students, I exclaimed, "and he has good hearing too"! They were stunned, and were perfectly behaved for the entire period. I never told them it was a carrot. I figured it was good for my reputation! Throughout the next few days, many teachers questioned me in the teachers lunch room, I did tell them, they got a kick out of it. They thought it a clever idea to make the students guess as to my sanity, making them less apt to screw around in my class! It took a while that first year, but I got the respect of the student body, and the staff!
11 years ago. Rating: 18 | |
it was my first day at Sunday School. They passed the collection plate. I dipped in, took out some coins, and put them in my little white plastic purse. (age 5)
There were coins in the holy well at the Catholic church. Again, I dipped in a fished out some wet coins. (Age 6)
11 years ago. Rating: 15 | |
figtree, Absolutely. I needed. Still do.
When my grandfather died at age 104 1/2, my son was young. I tried to explain to him about death. My mother-in-law had given me a pamphlet to expalin death to little ones. I thought that I was doing a great job with my explaination because he was so attentive as I talked. He did not interrupt and when I was finished I asked him if he understood what I was saying. His reply was, "So he's finished".
11 years ago. Rating: 14 | |
Our mother took my brother and I too a petting zoo. This is a small gathering of harmless animals, that are safe for children to touch.
My brother wanted to take a picture of me holding a baby goat. I squatted behind the goat while I held him in place at his front shoulders.
If you can imagine that, It was a very suspicious picture!
11 years ago. Rating: 13 | |
I don't think it happens to me. Certain comedians makes me laugh. Do you have a favorite comedian?
11 years ago. Rating: 10 | |
Banal means commoplace? not worth the time? stupid? I should look it up. : )
I like Conan O’Brian, Jimmy Fallon, Jimmy Kimmel, Amy Poler, Tina Fey ... many more (as long as they are fairly clean)
My sister and I were very inventive and partners in crime. We had one skate board and two sets of roller skates between the two of us and we loved to watch Roller Derby on Saturday mornings. We were also latch-key kids. My parents were convinced if they gave us a long list of chores to complete everyday after school that we would stay out of trouble... Every day we turned our house into a Roller Derby rink, inside and out. We raced up the front stairs, around and around our big old house, down the back steps, around the back entry way and down the side path to clamber up the front porch and begin all over again. We invited other children to participate as well. It was the coolest game ever. We also could complete all of our chores within 20 minutes.
My mother was none the wiser until we were both in our late twenties. That didn't stop her for giving us both heck. She was seriously ticked.
11 years ago. Rating: 7 | |
The assignment was to read a 3 page handout and highlight the words one didn't know. My eldest, a good reader with an ample vocabulary, finished quickly and began rummaging around throughout his binder.
The teacher approached and demanded to know why he wasn't doing the assignment. He showed her the one word he had highlighted.
Irritated, the teacher began pointing at words, demanding he tell her the word and what it meant. He complied through several words, and then she pointed at "disposition".
"Disposition," he replied politely, "is your mood or attitude. For example, yours is bad."
11 years ago. Rating: 7 | |
I climb towers in my job as an antenna tech. Ten years ago, I had colon cancer and was in the VA hospital for 23 days. I finally got to come home and recuperate. About three months later, I decided i would do a service call that involved climging a small, 30 foot tower and replace the rotor. I was still wearing sweat pants because belts iritated my wound. I was all loaded up with the rotor and a rope hooked to my climbing belt and I began my accent. About 10 ft up, the rope hooked the the belt and running under my helpers foot, pulled my pants to my ankles. Too bad there was no documentation.
11 years ago. Rating: 5 | |
The night I tried to "Borrow" a train...
11 years ago. Rating: 3 | |