Clonge
get a thank you note? I gave my friend a big check for his wedding 16 months ago. He took the time, however, to go to the bank and deposit it right away, but I never received anything. He ordered invitations from a printer, and all such packages that I've seen, include thank you cards. Even if he had to buy them separately, it's still no excuse. Same thing happened to our mutual friend. When I told him about it, he changed the subject.
Saying a person is too busy and that manners are a thing of the past is a total cop out and just indicates laziness and total self-absorption on the part of the recipient.
If the gift giver took the time to find and give a gift or even just gave money, then it is quite within reason to expect a thank you and they have every right to feel slighted and/or used.
21 Answers
witchway
Best answer!
There is no excuse for rudeness. Thank you notes take only minutes. Unfortuneatly, you can't fix stupid but you don't have to continue giving to people who are rude either.
| 12 years ago. Rating: 20 | |
FISH-O
I think it is rude however, I have discovered that there are people on this planet who have not been taught manners or how to say, "Thank you". Strange and true.
I now let it go. They can walk around all day long being rude. I have the choice to hang out with them or not hang out with them.
I once had a friend that would price check the gifts I gave his children to see how much money I spent and would report back to me about it. Very rude. He and his wife are not my friends any more. I hope they are doing well, I just don't want to know them.
| 12 years ago. Rating: 28 | |
Dardaigh
Shootah
I think it is something that alot of the younger generations just haven't been taught. They just do not know anything of manners. I can think of several young college educated people, who don't even know how to properly hold a spoon or fork! They hold their silverware like a small shovel, and being present while they are eating, is like watching someone scraping cow dung off the barn floor. It is pathetic!
Their parents definetly dropped the ball when it came to getting these kids ready to go out into the world.
| 12 years ago. Rating: 25 | |
I have to say, I prefer the Continental style of dining...fork in left hand and knife in the right, without putting down the knife and transferring the fork to the right hand.
Ducky
I have a few people to whom I regularly give (in my view) "substantial" gifts of money. The checks are cashed immediately and I am thanked, never. One by one, they are being stroked off my list. Manners seem to be going by the wayside.
| 12 years ago. Rating: 24 | |
This is something that should definitely be taught at home, by parents.
There's one person here at work, never says hello or replies if you say it to her....love to let a door go in her face! LOL ;)
sunnyB
I think it's polite to always say thank you. When I was a child I was always encouraged to write a thank you note to anyone who bought me a present, and we always encouraged our children to do the same. I think it's nice to receive a little thank you.
| 12 years ago. Rating: 23 | |
ROMOS
Some people think it's a bit outdated saying thank you,or sending a thank you note for a gift, personally I always say thanks one way or the other and get the odd looks and comments that go along with todays "take take take" generation, not all of them I may add, but it's quite common nowadays.
| 12 years ago. Rating: 22 | |
Tommyh
Yep,that sucks.My nephew recently got married & we sent him & his bride 500 bucks.Guess what we got....ZIP!
Once bitten,twice shy is what I say. I won't get caught again by him.
| 12 years ago. Rating: 21 | |
lambshank
My son seemed to lose his manners when he married, his wife is the rudest person I have ever met, despite repeated attempts at making her very welcome, they had little money and I purchased several big kitchen items for them, they have 2 children (whom spend every holiday with her family) I have spent a small fortune on things the children needed and on luxury things I know my son and daughter in law were unable to afford, the years have gone by, I am tired of the lack of manners, have never even received acknowledgement that the stuff even arrived (including money) let alone a thank you, so the pressies are scarce this year, my daughter had the same upbringing, as did the four foster children, all of whom have impeccable manners and compassion, I truly don't understand, they are the ones that miss out now, a thank you costs nothing
| 12 years ago. Rating: 20 | |
Dollybird
doolittle
I don't always expect a thank you note...I will take a verbal thank you too...but yes, it's rude to accept a gift without saying thank you. ANd I can't rationalize saying thanks for a gift that the receiver thinks is big vs. no thanks for a gift the receiver thinks is small- a gift is a gift.
| 12 years ago. Rating: 19 | |
melandrupert
the best thing is to give nothing then we will never get disapointed as we always expect a thank you but the new generation just dont do this so I done buy anything unless I want to get hurt .....
| 12 years ago. Rating: 18 | |
bulletman
Bob/PKB
The "thank you notes" I've received recently barely qualify. One was a photo of the bride and groom with a generic imprinted note saying thank you, but there was no personal note expressly thanking me for the specific gift I'd given them. Made me wonder if they even KNEW what my gift WAS. I don't like the "new manners"...or lack of....
| 12 years ago. Rating: 17 | |
bustieone
Good manners, yes like those taught by figures like Emily Post, never go out of date! Respect and moral values are taught, they do not just happen. This is what parents are suppose to do, it is on the parent handbook checklist (pg. 1) . Our society would be a better place if all families did this as part of the investment in our future. It makes no difference the social-economic status, it should be done. A castle or ghetto, both should have parents who do this for their children! It is the basis upon which a good character is built! We cannot leave this stuff up to teachers, exactly what many think should be done! Many teachers, do put letter writing, and thank you notes in their curriculum, and it is a good thing, as many families are not doing it anymore. Copies of Emily Post should be dusted off and distributed to young families! Perhaps social media could be channeled to do good like this, rather than the garbage that is shared!
| 12 years ago. Rating: 17 | |
tabber
I believe there are at least 13 solutions to every problem. I tend to be a given. I also have a big family and send them gifts sometimes for their birthdays. Some call and say thank you. Some may not but I know they appreciate the gift or at the very least I know they needed the gift. At Christmas I tend to give gifts to different people each year. I don't like feeling obligated and I don't like to see others feel obligated. I give gift at Christmas to people I think did something I really appreciated during the year. I give for thanks because of what I have received rather than wanting the receiver of the gift to call and praise. Of course it's great if you do get a thank you and praise for giving but its really not necessary. Being able to share and give to others is already a gift to the giver and a thank you to the given for being blessed enough to be able to give instead of needing to have someone give to you.
| 12 years ago. Rating: 16 | |
mycatsmom
clu
padovenick
The Lord loves a cheerful giver; and so I am. But when it comes to ingrates....there's where my own imperfection glows!!! A person without the ability to write, can speak 2 words 'thank you'. One who cannot speak, or write, can gesture. One who cannot do any of the above are the only ones i can excuse from giving this common, simple, courtesy. peace
| 12 years ago. Rating: 9 | |
hector5559
lindilou
I am not really very sensitive about such matters and consider the thankyou in their acceptance of the gift....leaps of joy and utterances of jubilation are always nice...but I draw the line at grovelling or slobbering...'specially on my feet!! A simple thanks.....8D
| 12 years ago. Rating: 6 | |
But with you question/statement, all you can do is make something your opposing party doesn't see the need for or share the huge significance you hold to it into something that could wreck a friendship over something its sadly best to let go and not make a mountain out of. Good luck with what ever path you choose since you are the one who has to live with the choices you make.