A few of the top contributers have really helped with some questions I've had in the past. I recently started seeing a guy that just turned 24 and I am 18, on our first date I learned he has a 6 year old little boy. I adore the way he treats him and would give up anything for that little boy. He told me he would let me meet him sometime, but I can understand that he is waiting to see if I am going to stick around or he's not serious. Is he legit in this for the long haul or just looking for a girl for a bit. I know people judge the age difference but we have talked about it and decided its not an issue. I don't know if he wants a relationship tho and I do, what do ya'll think?
10 Answers
Firstly what are your intentions?
Do you feel he has the right intentions? The age difference really isn't the issue, do you want to be a ready made mother , and knowing he has an ex with a child that person will be in his life refardless can you handle this?
I think its about the path you wish to take and it all comes down to your gut instincts.
Do YOU think there is a problem with you dating him? you must if you are asking for advice or its okay to date him, time to trust what you feel what your head tells you..
Love is hard work its not a walk in the park there are always ups and downs.
Good luck with what ever decision you make on this, your young enough to make mistakes :)
12 years ago. Rating: 12 | |
I see no problem with this as long as you feel you can handle the fact he is a father and his kid comes first and foremost in his life. Kids can make relationships hard. Make sure you are truly ready for all that. Give him time and prove yourself from the first time he has to break an engagement with you to look after his son. Remember too, this child has a mother which means your boyfriend has to interact with his ex a lot. Can you handle that? Be patient, you will be able to tell on your own if he is really into this for a relationship with you. Until then, check your heart, have fun and enjoy the ride. It's all a learning experience no matter which direction it takes. Learning is good ;)
12 years ago. Rating: 10 | |
I guess I have two comments as I have been in relationships where kids were involved- 1st the child will always come first unless this guy is mature enough and strong enough to give his energy to both of you. 2nd- something strikes me funny..you say you are falling in love with him because he loves his child...I think it is heartwarming (and pretty normal) to love your own child BUT, to have a lasting relationship you need to truly love and like who he is (everything included) and visa-versa.
12 years ago. Rating: 8 | |
An 18 year old female is often as mature as a 24 year old man, so there isn't really an age issue here. Two years ago (16/22), it would have been a HUGE issue.
I am confused by this statement: . I adore the way he treats him and would give up anything for that little boy. He told me he would let me meet him sometime,
If you haven't met the son yet, how do you know how your BF treats his son? You have no frame of reference other than what you've been told.
Please don't pressure to meet the Son. When your BF is comfortable with your relationship and feels it is serious enough to include his son, he will. Trying to push things is a little too pushy, in my opinion. When he talks about his child, you can say (i.e.) "He sounds like such a sweetheart. I hope I get to meet him someday."
11 years ago. Rating: 7 | |
WAIT: Look at it this way: Let's say you knew each other. 12 years ago, you were 6 and he was 12. He was twice your age. Too much of a difference. Now at 24 and 18, he's less than 1.5 times your age. You're catching up. When you're the same age, who could possibly object?
10 years ago. Rating: 3 | |
Being 18 makes me n adult an my am my boyfriend both know I don't act like one haha
It's not how mature u are or how smart or how old u like its how u feel about each other
So what if people say it's bad who cares about them
Heck my boyfriend mother hates me an talks trash about me every time I go over
But he stands up for me and we love each other an are currently trying to have a child
:)
11 years ago. Rating: 3 | |
The other maybe the mother wants to know what kind of person her child would be around, thats what mothers do get all protective of their children :)