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    Why do women hit on me although they know I'm a married man?

    What should I do? I have several women at my work and even at my church keep hitting, one even actually told me that she wants to do it with me.

    +1  Views: 6264 Answers: 23 Posted: 13 years ago
    mat21225

    Obviuosly you enjoy sending 'I'm available' signals. Your wife must appreciate being such an ass.

    23 Answers

    "I am happily married, but I also love women" "But I am Just like average men, I just can't take my eyes off from beautiful women." "And I'd love to have different experiences, sexually" "I would love to have one night stand with them"




    Enough said. You're putting out signals to these women. They will continue to make advances as long as you enjoy the attention.

    Coach

    Good answer Colleen. TU

    Colleen

    Moderator

    Naturally nice is one thing, but look at your comments. They speak loud and clear that you are into the idea of extra marital sex. Whether you act apon it or not, it doesn't matter. The openness to the idea is what's sending signals to these women. I'm making an assumption here but based on your own statements, I'm guessing you do a bit of flirting on your own.

    Colleen

    Moderator

    Hi Raider! Welcome back bud : )Happy retirement tomorrow!

    Raider_retired 3_29_

    Right to the point. TU!

    schubee

    Well, I'm naturally nice to everybody. I'm kind and sensitive. Should I make a bad look then? LOL

    Could it be something you're doing or saying that is giving them the signal to come onto you? Have you told them that you're HAPPILY married? I'm thinking that you've not drawn the line in the sand clear enough. Maybe you secretly like the attention?

    Schubee...It natural to notice an attractive person, but if you want your marriage to be healthy, you'll have to learn to "take your eyes off" of them. The "real problem" isn't the signals they're sending you...actually I find it hard to believe that it's a problem for you at all. The real problem is the signal you're sending them! If you really care about your wife then give her 100% of your attention and your "other women problems" will go away!

    Colleen

    Moderator

    Good advice Coach.

    Oh I more thought on this, It doesn't matter whether you are married or single you are still and mane, just because you are married doesn't mean that you will never be attracted to another woman.
    It's completely natural. The question is do you value your marriage not to entertain the thought of hooking up with these other women.


    The process starts in your mind, if you can or do imagine yourself with these other women and fantasize about them, it will be much easier to be unfaithful. If you catch that thought and don't dwell on it and think about your wife or just another subject, you will be less likely to put those thoughts into action.


    If you value your marriage, and don't want to destroy your wife's trust, keep your mind away from these other women.

    bsurana

    wrong for indian married woman

    If it's not some vibe you're giving off like stated above, then speak plainly to them and tell them you are married. I know it doesn't mean what it used to and to some it doesn't mean anything, but they'll get the message eventually. You may also want to get a nice big picture of your wife and put it at your desk, maybe that will send a clearer message?


    Keep your phone on vibrate and when you don't want to be bothered by their advances, say excuse me, I have to take this my wife is calling? Sometime people want what they think will be a challenge or what they can't have. Maybe you have to be more direct and less polite? Good luck.

    I love that girls hit on my husband. We joke about it... It is really flattering. Talk to your wife and let her know first of all. Then just let it roll off your back.

    sounds like a case of "I can't wait to look in the mirror" to me. put your ego back in place and things should settle down.

    schubee

    You don't know how serious I am.

    If you are saying and showing that you are happily married...then this shouldn't be happening.


    You are clearly sending a message that you're available and your loving the attention. Your ring (if you even wear one) is more than a piece of jewelry my friend. It's a symbol of your love, commitment, and fidelity. Tell them to leave you alone because you're not available...better yet have your wife tell them...they'll get the message

    Coach

    Thanks Colleen...sounds like he's fine with the attention and I'm guessing his wife doesn't even know about the other women hitting on him. TU back at ya!

    Colleen

    Moderator

    ".better yet have your wife tell them...they'll get the message "


    You know coach, I had the same advice in my answer but removed it. Sounds to me like he needs to be a man and be honest with himself. Having his wife do it is like running home to mommy and saying the icky girls won't leave me alone. If he's a true husband to his wife, that should be enough for him to put these women in their place all on his own. ; )


    TU for you.

    You must really be something! Seriously, tell them you are happily married and are going to stay that way.

    Well I would hope it was not because you are leading them on to do that I hope......

    Don`t worry just keep on the way you are and before you know it you will be that far up yourself no one will be able to see you.
    Sounds as though you have a inflated ego, which you must reassert to your self . I'm not saying this to you in a mean way just my opinion.
    Some women flirt with married men because they have a fear of commitment themselves.
    schubee

    What do you mean by a fear of commitment themselves?
    Ms Sinclair

    They don't really want to get involved in a serious relationship with a man so they flirt with someone who has commitments elsewhere.
    schubee

    Ha, they just want attention, not commitment, right? Then maybe I should be aggresive whenever a girl flirts with me, then she will get scared the heck out of me! ;-P

    Thanks all for the comments.
    The woman who told me that she wants to do it was a good friend of mine. I don't talk to her anymore. I told her I am not interested and I even blocked/defriended her from Facebook. She still texts me once in a while if she could see me, but no way I would respond her.


    I posted this thread because yes I am happily married, but I also love women. I never cheated my wife for over 10 yrs of marriage. Our sex is great too. But I am Just like average men, I just can't take my eyes off from beautiful women. My wife knows that. And I'd love to have different experiences, sexually! But the real problem is that I keep getting these strange signals from the women. Some of them are really attractive. I would love to have one night stand with them if all is fine. But every time I think about it, my spirit says no. It's like my body and my spirit are fighting each other.


    Well, I don't know if any of you have similar thoughts and experiences. I've got to go.
    Thanks again!

    You're probably too good looking. Try growing up a mustache, that should take care of the situation.

    You have a pic of you? I mean, just to be able to make a proper evaluation of the case... ;)

    You don't say if these women are also married. They certainly don't appear to be Christian like. If you love your wife, you would tell them to back off. Unless, you are enjoying the attention.

    must be lucky mate

    If they were to hit on me, I would hit back!

    Certain women go after a married men because its attractive,and safe,not nessasarily because of their looks.Have you noticed you get hit on more now that your married then when you were single?Think about it

    tell me your secret I would love to have your problem

    innocent or want some thing from you
    bsurana

    pyar par kisi ka jor nahi chalta.bhawana mai bah jata hai.bhale bure ka gyan chhor kar dusre ki jindgi kharab karti hai

    whats the size of a basketball court

    Ms Sinclair

    I don't get that one.


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