1 Answer

I do not feel that you are wrong at all. Firstly, you have the right to raise your children the way you see fit (For now anyway). It appears you are trying to allow them an opportunity to excel in life. Looking back, (I am 48)I did not like a lot of the things my parents did in regards to TV viewing and the like. We watched or were allowed to watch cartoons on Saturday mornings for a few hours. The last one to play was Tarzan and then it was outside for us kids (5 Boys).

We were taught, and encouraged to read books. Granted we did not have all the cable shows or video games that are available today, I feel that if we had my parents would have encouraged, insisted we read. I feel that the like for reading is a taught behavior. My daughter loves to read, and came to do so by hearing me talk about the books I had, and were currently reading, and by seeing me read, and realizing that was my means of relaxation, and excape from stress etc. A healthy escape.

A well read person and a highly institutionally educated person are very hard to tell apart. To this day I read, and watch very little television. It serves as more of a backgound ambiant than anything else. Now my daughter is 18. I never specifically stated she could not watch television or stay caught up in online social sites or video games. Matter of fact thinking about it she is free to choose. I feel by example she has personally and independently chosen not to.

Ironically she is in all of the AP (Advanced Placement) classes in school (A Senior). She is dialed in to most current events, and rarely even uses the PC for socializing. This goes even further. We boys (my brothers and I) had to read the "Emily post book of Etiquette". My mother would actually quiz us on the information. When each of us turned 13 she got a copy for us. I still have mine, and it has served me well. I feel comfortable in most any setting. My mother stated that she would teach us correctly, and allow us to know and understand the correct ways of life, but it was on us to live that way. She had fullfilled her duty in allowing us to obtain the knowledge. It seems to me you are doing the same. I salute, and commend you.

To end this I will say that we as parents have an obligation to expose our children to the right things, and to encourage them to involve themselves with the right things, and to play a part in developing right behaviours. Beyond that it is their choice(Free will). What they see in us is extremely important. They will and do in most cases follow our example. I am not even close to perfect or anything of the sort. I at times will even tell my daughter -- I may not do this correctly, but I am going to tell you the right way so you can. I have to do this because there are times all of us are not good examples on everything, but they have the need, and right to have exposure to it, to the right way. So to preclude the hypocrit status I plainly tell her I am not doing, acting, performing whatever it it may be in the right manner. I then tell her the correct manner, and tell her that I am not perfect, but she has a right to know the truth, the correct way regardless of my actions on the particular matter, and that is not being a hypocrit nor has she ever accused me of being one. Being a parent is not hard nor is it rocket science.

Warmest Regards,
Mark Taylor, PhD

13 years ago. Rating: 5
Comment this answer Add new comment